Holy Crap!

So.... you can make money out of graffiti?

A ha! Potholes

That's all. 

Potholes.

Idol's on and I can't stop thinking I could do that...if I was younger. 

Songs to fight crime by

It's a lonely life this crime fighting of graffiti, rubbish, abandoned cars and errant children. 

I have decided to listen to some music while I patrol the 'Innie'. Do like the nick name I've given my filthy, graffitized little burg. Of course you do, everyone agrees with me. 

So, here I am 'downloading' some songs from the 'internet'. WOW! I've been told Limewire is the best to use. Apparently the 'internet' is full of rubbish worse than the 'Innie'. 

Mother says there's nothing better than a bit of Liberace in your head while you walk along the streets. I say she's RIGHT! 

 

I think tomorrow I'll put on the jump suit and hit the streets with Liberace thumping in my head. 

The finer things in life

I am taking time reflect on all of my good deeds in the past 48 hours. 

Have I made a difference? Well, in my eyes I have. I look around me and see happy people, peering out from their windows, holding back cheap curtains and smiling. These people see there local area in a new light. 

A little part of me wanted to think their smiles were hiding the abuse and ridicule I have had thrown at me. But no, they were smiling because I had done something that nobody else really cared about. 

So fear not Inner West of Sydney, I'll be there to patrol the streets, photographing rubbish, graffiti and abandoned cars. What you don't give a second thought to, fills my entire day and it's all I can think of. Day and Night. 

And I hate you for it.

Lady in Number 45

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Lady in number 45 has taken it upon herself to 'patrol' our street to 'defend the helpless' against people like 'me'. 

Welcome to yesterday. (ZING!) - not sure if this is still being used. Heard it on a old Saturday Night Live (Jimmy Fallon is great, he should do movies)

I'd say something but the Court Ordered Protection Officer is recording what I say. 

Heh, but not what I type.

I feel more affinity with the Dark Knight.....

Scooter Chase - update

A slight setback in my war on Graffiti/Abandoned Cars/Unregistered Vehicles. 

Turns out my home made spike trap was a little too effective. Scooter was a write off and girl being cared for at local doctors surgery. 

More bad news.

The 5 year old was the granddaughter of Lady at Number 45. 

Police have been good and will do both cases on the same day in 3 weeks. 

Mother not impressed. But I will press on. 

Scooter Chase

Chasing a 5 year old girl on a unregistered scooter. She's a quick one. 

Trying to herd her down a street towards a home made spike trap I've set up. That should slow her down enough to take her down. As usual, Police are refusing my calls for back up. 

Can't shake the feeling that I've seen her somewhere before. Doesn't matter, I'm in the right and everybody else is wrong. 

Will post a map of the chase later tonight. 

It's not just graffiti

I have walked outside my door and what should my 'Crime Fighting' instincts tell me?

There's more to this than I first thought. What's more disturbing than graffiti? Abandoned cars. 

Here's a classic example. This car was parked under a private carport last night and was still there this morning. A quick call to the local council and I was told that was quite normal, but my 'senses' (sorry Batman but Spiderman does have some cool powers) told me otherwise.

I'll be keeping an eye on this one as it's registration is due to expire 11/8/2009. I'll be checking on this everyday. 

Paper Advertisement

I have just sent off to my local paper the advert I want to run in this weeks edition. 

I need to see if there are others out there like me. 

Graffiti Crime Fighters

Join me in the fight against the graffiti scum of the 

inner west.You must have a digital camera, notepad and 

be able to walk the streets of Sydney's Inner West 

day and night. Minimum 18 hour commitment or don't bother.

It's not all hard work! We can talk about graffiti, rubbish and 

how bad our local council is while we walk. FUN!

Mother will make us sandwiches. YUM!

Must be willing to call me the 'Dark Knight' whilst 

on patrol and have a passing interest in being 

called 'Boy Wonder'. Sorry ladies.

NO CRIPPLES! I walk fast and I've never heard of a 

crime fighting retard, have you?

Call Guido Balonium on 02 5555 5555

email:gcfinnerwest@gmail.com

Let's see what kind of reaction I get to this. 

Night Patrol

I decided to patrol my local area last night. The graffiti scum wouldn't have expected me to do that twice in one day!

My torch isn't as bright has I thought it would be. But that doesn't matter, the streetlights are quite good in this area. Infact, a little too good. I have a feeling they may be hindering my attempts in crime fighting. I shall write to EnergyAustralia and complain about the waste of electricity.

As luck would have it, a EnergyAustralia van is parked down the street from me. I approached one of the workers and asked if they were there to clean the graffiti. 

I may as well have been asking him to recite the Magna Carta.

No. They weren't there to clean up the graffiti.

Can you believe it? After less than 24 hours of doing this I sure can.

When I told him about the mass of graffiti in the local area, surely EnergyAustralia would have staff out at night to clean it up. Nobody wants to see that kind of work done in the daylight.

You could have knocked me over with a feather when he told me (get this) they were there to fix a faulty street light. Apparently graffiti cleaning isn't part of their duties. 

Now, I'm not having a go at this guy. He seemed pleasant enough for a pole climbing monkey, but he must have noticed the tags all over the pole. 

He told me the 'tags' I was referring to were actually 'Pole Numbers' added to each pole as a means of 'indentification'. I said "it doesn't matter what new word the youngsters have coined for this kind of stuff, it's still good old fashion tagging to me". 

Feeling frustrated by his obvious mental shortcomings, I decided to call it a night and headed off home to plan my next outing. 

It begins - follow up

The Police have kindly returned my camera and have warned me not to do it again. 

I plan to spend the rest of the day working on a slogan or catchphrase to use. 

[edit]

Just finished reading Batman comic. Have decided I will need my very own 'Boy Wonder'. Placing ad in local papers to see if any other like minded people are out there. Surely I'm not the only one?

Catchphrase and slogan can wait until I have finished my search. 

It begins

Well, today's the start of my quest to rid Sydney's Inner West of Graffiti. God but I hate it!

Here's a run down of my diary:

8:00am: Awake and dressed in Graffiti Crime Fighting clothing. May need to chase down a crook or three. Have used Batman as my inspiration.

8:05am: Spill tea on GCF cape

9:00am: Cape cleaned and dried. Walking out the front door.

9:02am: Back inside. The neighbours are laughing. Maybe the cape was too much.

9:15am: Dressing in tracksuit and joggers. Have left via the back door and jumped the fence to avoid crowd out the front. 

9:20am: Success! Found my first bit of graffiti. Looks pretty fresh. Have decided to wait in bushes to see if they come back for more

9:45am: Lady in number 45 screaming something from her window. If she doesn't shut up she'll scare them off.

9:50am: Showed Lady in number 45 my camera and took a few shots of her in window to calm her down. Not sure if she gets it. Still screaming.

10:15am: Graffiti hoons have not come back. 

10:17am: Hear Police sirens nearby, maybe they are after them?

10:20am: Sirens very close now. Might get some shots of the action.

10:23am: Trying to explain to Police what I was doing. 

11:00am: Leaving Police Station without my camera and a order to attend court in three weeks.

12Noon: Been walking for over an hour and heaps of graffiti to record, but feel lost without my camera. Geotagging is so hot now and I just know it will make or break this blog.

12:20pm: Decide to call it quits for the day. My new crime fighting shoes have given me blisters. Did Batman have this problem? 

4:00pm: Turning up volume of TV to drown out the protesters and laughing neighbours out front of house. 

Not a great start, but a start none the less.